England shocked and humbled by Afghanistan
England v Afghanistan, 15th October 2023.
Afghanistan 284 all out
England 215 all out
Afghanistan (shock the world) and win by 69 runs
Well this wasn’t in the script for the defending World Champions but whomever penned this particular sporting screenplay cannot be accused of writing an unrealistic story for this was a thoroughly deserved and comprehensive victory straight from the very top of World Cup shocks of all time. Perhaps, as I’m in a sportingly romantic mood, we should turn to Afghanistan spin bowler Mujeeb Ur Rahman as the first of our cricketing storytellers as first he clubbed 28 quick runs from just 16 balls received at the end of his team’s mightily impressive stint with the bat, before bowling an over from the cricketing Gods at England’s Chris Woakes that was pure theatre, skill, guile, endeavour, mystery and entertainment writ large, before he dismantled Woakes’ “castle” of stumps behind him. My goodness, this was cricket in its grandest form, and Mujeeb would add England’s only guiding light yesterday in Harry Brook to his tally of wickets that also included Joe Root, and with Woakes and Brook dismissed in such quick fashion, England were 169–8 and staring down the barrel of arguably the greatest shock in cricket World Cup history.
Although run out unnecessarily by his captain when cruising along and 80 not out, 21 year old Rahmanullah Gurbaz has quite the story to tell too as he, in the cricketing vernacular, “only dealt in boundaries” as he clubbed and carted around a woeful and out of form Chris Woakes (and any and every England bowler who deigned to bowl at him!) on his way to a 33 ball half century and 80 from just 57 balls before his unfortunate demise. Where Afghanistan wobbled and threatened to collapse mid-innings, up stepped wicket-keeper batsman Ikram Alikhil who calmly steadied the innings by rotating the strike and keeping the scoreboard ticking along with a 61 ball half century and ultimately a well played and innings saving 58 from 66 balls received. A couple of hours later, the 23 year old wicket-keeper from Kabul would snag a sharp catch behind the stumps to extinguish England’s last hope in Harry Brook, and we haven’t accounted yet for the part played in our cricketing story for the ages of Mohammad Nabi (2 wickets for 16 runs) or crowd darling Rashid Khan (3 wickets for 37 runs). Nabi grabbed the vital early wicket of Dawid Malan that consigned England to a faltering 68–3 before Khan, so impressive in his early spell of bowling, returned to rip out 3 late order England wickets, with the dismissal to remove Liam Livingstone an absolute gem.
Coached by ex England international Jonathan Trott, he was remarkably level headed during the after match interviews and even suggested, without his tongue in cheek, that this wasn’t a “perfect performance” and he demanded his players build on this, only their second all time victory in a World Cup, but you could just hear the pride seeping from his every pore. His players though were rather more emotional, with both Rashid Khan and Mujeeb Ur Rahman dedicating this win to the families back home in Afghanistan still dealing with the unimaginable fallout from the recent earthquake, with Rashid Khan emotionally stating “cricket is something that brings joy to the people back home” before recognising the achievement in defeating the World Champions and hoping “this win will put a little bit of smile on their faces” as so many thousands of his compatriots endeavour to rebuild their homes, their lives and their very existence.
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So what of the defending Champions and a thoroughly dismantled and badly beaten England? England captain Jos Buttler was magnanimous in conceding “Afghanistan outplayed us today” and perhaps more tellingly “this is a tough loss to take”. It sure is. It’s also the bitter truth to our sporting tale and a loss that leaves England precariously hanging on to a fading hope of qualification for the Semi-Finals after their second defeat in three games. I already have three Semi-Final berths sown up in the shape of the hosts India, New Zealand and South Africa, with England now battling with Pakistan, Australia and, to a lesser extent, Sri Lanka, for that fourth and final spot. At the time of writing, Australia and Sri Lanka are facing off in Lucknow and whilst not strictly an elimination game, today’s loser will almost certainly be out with zero points and three consecutive losses to their name, and England, only two points better off at this stage of the competition, still have to play both of today’s opponents as well as Pakistan and an unbeatable looking India.
The signs do not look promising for Jos Buttler and his England team and up next, they have the mighty, free scoring South Africa to deal with.
Saturday’s game is HUGE.
Since were we last together, my Los Angeles Dodgers did indeed throw their incredible seasonal record out of the play-offs window together with their tickets to baseball’s October “Big Dance” and the break for international football continues to be the second biggest suck in sport and just below the Orwellian VAR system that our Overlords are determined to facilitate the final death throes of what was once Pele’s “Beautiful Game”. Returning to India and a cricket World Cup they are seemingly destined to win, on the same day that England firmly dispensed with the spirited fight of Bangladesh, Pakistan chased an incredible 345 runs to defeat Sri Lanka by 6 wickets, South Africa smashed Australia by a thumping 134 runs, New Zealand brushed aside Bangladesh by 8 wickets to retain their 100% winning start to the tournament and the hosts India chased 273 to defeat Afghanistan by 8 wickets with 15 overs still remaining before they inflicted a horrible chastening to Pakistan by chasing 192 to win, achieving this comfortably by 7 wickets, and with fully 20 overs to spare! Although a one-sided affair, this was my game of the tournament so far. A wholly partisan Indian crowd of over 100,000 packed into the Narendra Modi Stadium in Ahmedabad and with Pakistan 155–2 and their hero Babar Azam exactly 50 not out, the noisy din of a celebratory crowd had been replaced by a low and quietened murmur. An hour of exhilarating cricket later, Pakistan had spectacularly collapsed to 191 all out, losing their final 8 wickets for just 36 total runs in the process, and the ear-splitting din returned as they roared on an imperious innings from their captain Rohit Sharma and the very man who is firm favourite to be lifting the World Cup trophy in this very stadium, and in just over a month’s time.
Since we were last together the world continues to turn at an ugly angle with fairy tales of countries having the right to defend themselves as they obliterate their neighbours from our earthly map. One war replaces another in the forever war of our consciousness. Ghoulish, wraith like creatures appear constantly on our Telescreens to defend the barbarity of war, the deletion of human rights and a blind eye is cast to the inhuman destruction of untold hundreds of thousands of human lives as we’re told to pick a side, wave a flag and not trust our own lying eyes.
We never learn. Perhaps there’s a strong argument to be made that we’re simply not permitted to.
And this rambling fool can only despair at our collective plight.
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