Glass Onion: A Knives Out mystery (2022)
“Tonight, in this very room, a murder will be committed”
Glass Onion, so named as a homage to the magnificent Beatles song of the same name as well as the futuristic James Bond villainous lair in which this Cluedo style murder mystery takes place, is a sequel to the highly popular Knives Out from 2019 and although also directed by the man who helmed its predecessor, Rian Johnson, is simply not a patch on its original inspiration. That’s not to say that Glass Onion isn’t a good film, it is, and perfect holiday fare for all the family. I just picked holes from the very beginning and found myself playing catch up on a film I’d been eagerly awaiting to see for a long time and this rather spoiled my enjoyment and not even the unexpected and gear crunching cameo of Hugh Grant midway through could save my overall appreciation of a film I really hoped to enjoy far, far more than I did.
From my one and only viewing hence far, here are my albeit minor negatives of the film:
Face masks. Why? It’s Hollywood for heavens sake! Even worse? The “magic” spray that magically allows everyone to remove their masks! That fearsome virus can’t get you now! So you’ve arrived on a jetty to be transported to a multi Billionaire’s private island and futuristic house powered by an earth and humanity destroying material but first, a random stranger you’ve never met, nor do you know their medical credentials, is spraying an unknown substance into the back of your mouth? I know it’s “only a film” but that is in fact my point: It’s a film! So stop it with the masks and magical medicine being administered by a stranger. It is only a film and this film is now cast in stone for a cinematic forever.
It’s called “Predictive Programming” and that’s a whodunnit all of its own.
The second and most egregious of all is the 40 or so minutes it takes the film to actually get into its stride. Invitations are sent to a gaggle of friends in the form of a board game riddle, the Billionaire’s array of friends, be they Social Media influencers, Socialites, Models, Politicians, a quirky detective and even a spurned best friend, are all deloused, inspected and transported to an idyllic isle and a Bond villain’s crystal bunker and finally, after three quarters of an hour, the brilliantly played detective deliberately ruins the party even before the killing has begun in earnest with a similarly brilliantly played out set piece and finally, the lights can go out and the real games can begin.
Daniel Craig returns from the first film in an expected trilogy of Knives Out inspired whodunnits as everyone’s favourite private detective and a brilliantly portrayed hybrid of Sherlock Holmes and the bumbling buffoonery of a Hercule Poirot and/or Inspector Clouseau. He returns too with his own distinctive Southern drawl of an accent as well as his own vernacular of “Hell’s Bells”, “Fiddlesticks” and “Shit balls” and this pleased the forever teenager in me immensely. As did the inclusion of one of my favourite all time actors Edward Norton as the fabulously wealthy Billionaire and self imposed target for death in his own magical lair or his “compound” or “rich arsehole’s house”. He is the instigator of the deathly game as well as the puppet master of his old friends whom he calls “disruptors” and “system breakers” and Norton and Craig clearly enjoyed inhabiting their polar opposite roles.
As did the ensemble cast surrounding them. Dave Bautista left the Guardians of the Galaxy universe to inhabit an internet influencer and men’s health advocate, Kate Hudson is hilariously incorrect as an ex model come socialite desperate for the attention of her friends, Leslie Odom Junior is the Billionaire’s chief scientist and Kathryn Hahn particularly stands out with her portrayal of the vacuity of a modern day politician. One role has been deliberately left out of this appraisal for spoiler reasons and even in spite of the fact the actress’ portrayal being the equal of Edward Norton or Daniel Craig, but further cameos abound from Jessica Henwick as a fussy and worried Personal Assistant, Madelyn Cline as the archetypal rich man’s young girlfriend and Noah Segan returns from the first film as a stoner slacker who mysteriously seems to amble around the island before taking a ringside seat to enjoy the film’s denouement.
The real positives are the performances of Daniel Craig, Edward Norton, Kathryn Hahn and Jessica Henwick, the direction of Rian Johnson, the gorgeous cinematography of Steve Yedlin and the production design of Rick Heinrichs. Kudus too for the musical score from Nathan Johnson and the inclusion of the Red Hot Chili Peppers “Under the Bridge”, David Bowie’s “Star Man” and the Bee Gees “To Love Somebody” among many others that, suffice to say, had to include The Beatles “Glass Onion” (played over the film’s closing credits) as well as Edward Norton strumming the beginning to “Blackbird” on acoustic guitar to greet his guests and would be crime solvers.
Dump the masks and the magical medicine, strip back a lot of the first 45 minutes and scoot to the Hugh Grant cameo and you have yourself a fantastic film.
“Trying to make a dove-tail joint, yeah
Looking through a glass onion”.
“Glass Onion: A Knives Out mystery” can also be found within my 7 volumes of “Essential Film Reviews Collection” on Amazon with each and every volume free to read should you have a Kindle “Unlimited” package. All 9 of my self-published books can also be read for free on Kindle (but go on, treat yourself to a paperback or hardback version!) and should you watch my short Youtube video linked in the middle of this article you’ll also find links to my Patreon and Buy Me A Coffee and other ways of supporting my work as an independent writer.
"The Essential Film Reviews Collection VOL.1" - link to Amazon
Thanks for reading. I hope this message in a bottle in The Matrix finds you well, prospering, and the right way up in an upside down world.